A few days later, I received a response from my father via email.

Son,

I have spent quite a bit of time on your question. I have analyzed my own life and my relationship with your mother and this is what I have come up with.

You have to become and be a leader.

As you are well aware, I have been the leader in our household. It has not come without struggle, and neither will it come without struggle in your own relationship. Becoming a leader comes with time and with experience. It won't happen overnite.

I tell you this because I believe you need to hear it from me. I feel sure that you have learned some valuable lessons in your upbringing, but it is also imperative that you learn as you go. Whether you realize it at this point or not, you have the tools in your proverbial quiver to champion a relationship as a leader in your home. 

It will also require Samantha to make this work. She will have to give you the time, ability and allow you to use your inherent and learned resources to take the role of a leader and to do it effectively. This. too, will not come without a struggle. It is a "slow dance" that you will have to perfect with time.

That said, you are capable. I believe in you. And whether it is Samantha that steps in or someone else in your life, I want you to have the resolve to be and become the leader of your home.

With Love,

Dad